


Hand Against Hand, And

by TrisB



Category: Terminator: The Sarah Connor Chronicles
Genre: F/M, Free Will, Gen, Robosexuality, Tarot
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2009-03-07
Updated: 2009-03-07
Packaged: 2017-10-09 21:42:21
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 398
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/91898
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TrisB/pseuds/TrisB
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>John and Cameron and the relationships of creation.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Hand Against Hand, And

**Author's Note:**

> Title borrowed from Ani DiFranco's "Rock Paper Scissors": _it's hand against hand/and both hands are mine/it's standing in a circular line_.

The thought had crossed his mind, less like a bird flitting across the sky and more like the devil card a Tarot reader had once told his mother crossed her. It stuck with him, weighted on him. He had sent Cameron to himself for a purpose, programmed her with directives that respected the desires of two Johns, not in the order this John would like. She was an offer. All he had to do was say yes.

But his mother, when she spoke of Kyle (however rarely she spoke of Kyle), never dwelt on John's father being strong or smart or a brave fighter - those things went without saying. She didn't call him just or kind, and John knew that was because she didn't really know Kyle at all. What she said was: _he loved me_. When she decided against all her instincts to stick with Charley, she explained: _he loves us_. There were a few good reasons Sarah Connor might have to work with somebody. There was only one she ever had to trust.

So Cameron was his. So what? If John never grew up to be the man behind those controls, shouldn't it be fine with him? His future self was malevolent, a timebomb within him that had sent this girl-shaped trap. But his mom didn't like Riley, either, though if anybody might love him, surely one brave or crazy enough to stick around after all this ought to be it. When John kissed her it was a question, and sure enough her lips responded with their own agenda. The way Riley wanted him was desperate and of some private origin, and being wanted back was all John had been taught to seek.

Now Riley had gone, pulled away as always by unknown human wants. Now Cameron, eyes shining, handed him the key to her destruction's lock. The way she looked to him for guidance, for some unfathomable help; the sluggish way she seemed to struggle with her program these days -- John had always known that when she acted separately from his will, it wasn't her own that she followed. This is what John had always been sure of, what had kept him crossed all these months.

He heard her unartful voice lowering, shaping words she had to choose one after the other and the next after that, and he was no longer all so sure.


End file.
